Breakfast Bonanza!

I am a creature of habit. Every morning I do exactly the same thing. I roll into the IHOP parking lot at 8:45. I park in the same row on the same side. I then head into the coffee shop and grab the same drink, tea au lait, vanilla almond, two tablespoons of honey, soy milk. There is rarely a deviation in this plan.

This morning however, the world turned itself upside down. First, I couldn't park where I normally would. The parking lot is being repaved. So I parked in Herrenhut and walked over to work.

So I'm in the coffee shop ordering my beverage, or rather nodding that I would like my usual. I'm just looking around, and I notice a sign announcing the arrival of a breakfast bagel. No joke. This morning I was the first to order and consume a Higher Grounds breakfast bagel. I had ham, cheese, and eggs! But there were so many options! The price is totally comparable to any fast food breakfast sandwich, but it wasn't greasy or heavy. In short, I feel invigorated after eating it.

Excellent work, Dennis and team. I applaud this new menu item!

Coming Out of Gray - I (heart) Augustine

I'm reading this book, "The Story of Christianity." It's big and I'm just reading the parts that interest me (the more I read, the more I find interesting). I've had some questions lately about the cannonization of the Bible and the council of Nicea. So I thought I should read some historical accounts just so that I could have a more accurate view of motivations and the "players" in these dramas.

So at any rate I'd just finished some great sections on Gnosticism and the Arian Controversy when I stumbled over a section on Augustine. I read it and enjoyed it thoroughly. He was a man well acquainted with his position before God. He understood the depth of his depravity, he knew his inadequacy. He lived as a man who knew forgiveness and the grace that is offered on the cross.

He says, "When I thought of devoting myself entirely to God...It was I that wished to do it, and I that wished not to do it. It was I. And since I neither completely wished nor completely refused, I fought against myself and tore myself to pieces."

This rings so true to me. It's something that I have been working on. Someone told me over a year ago that I was "gray". They told me I have a difficult time telling between right and wrong, they told me I saw a lot of gray areas in life.

I was a little miffed upon hearing this. I prided myself on being a good person, I always obeyed! But I found myself nodding in agreement at this observation. When push came to shove I often had difficulty in saying that there was a right and wrong. Generally not with large doctrines, but with small ones. There are a lot of reasons for this I think, primarily, I was taught to think rigorously and challenge ideas. I was told quite often to fight for the liberal position. I was often the devil's advocate, mostly because I had the ability to separate my beliefs from any position I had to argue. I spent a lot of time researching and defending positions I didn't really believe in. When the debate was over, often my teachers would ask, "Do you believe any of what you just said?" Most often I would just shrug and say, "Not a word." This is one of the things I love the most about my upbringing, but it has also left me with a lot of gray.

I lived (and continue to some extent) in a struggle, not fully wanting to embrace the "right" road. Something deep inside goes "but what about..." By doing this I found myself in conflict. I was tearing myself apart. In the last year I have made concerted efforts to flee the "gray" in my life. I have said "no" to a lot of things previously classified as "gray", in this process I have found a greater peace or calm. Mike would maybe call these "gray" things the little foxes. I'm trying to chase away the little things that steal my passion, zeal, and love. These little things can make my heart so dull. Obviously, I still struggle. But I feel more settled.

I've always liked Augustine. I mean his theology was crucial to the early church and that's great, but I like his words, his sorrow over his sin, over his life. I love that he asks questions, I love that he searched hard and he found God.

Back Office Antics

We got new hats in the bookstore to sell to the masses. We celebrated this new product with this portrait. You too can have your very own mission's base hat, just drop by your local Forerunner Bookstore.

Meditations on Cold Medicine

Right now I'm coming to you from the land of the ubber dopey. I'm having some allergy issues so I am on some drugs that make me a little loopey but have a profound affect on a cold. The following is what I am thinking about as I am drifting in and out of lucidity. Seat belts everyone.

1) There are a lot of complex problems in the world. I recently subscribed to The Economist. I thought my brain may be rotting from all the People which I was reading, so I thought I'd challenge myself to something better. It is very interesting, and it reminds me how delicate the world we live in is. We are held together by a thread. Jesus has quite the reform to start when he gets back.

2) Britney and K-fed should just stop. and so know you see I still read people. But this is appalling just appalling.

3) There will be a lot of people who said "Jesus, I love you." but really didn't know Him at all. Just watched Oprah sing gospel songs to Jesus and saw her praising God, but yet she is far from Him. I, too, must be careful, lest my heart grow cold.

4)You can train goldfish to play soccer. Wired magazine did a blip on this, but I was reading it on cold medicine so I'm not sure what the article was really about. This is yet another effort to stem the tide of deteriorating brain matter.

5) Alias is over. All hail an era.

6) Imogene Heap is play in Lawrence right now. Couldn't get tickets. Really bummed.

7) Seven is the number of perfection. Couldn't have just six things, that is the number of the beast.

That's it. I am about to slip off into a sweet but terribly confusing dream I am sure.

Night.

It is so green!

I've been taking a blog break. I've just been too crazy to try to formulate anything worth reading.

I just got back from six days of "camping" in parkville, MO. It wasn't really camping because there was running water. But that's the only kind of camping I can do. It was very green. That's what out of towners kept telling me; "It's so green."

I spent a lot of time describing IHOP. That was more fun then it sounds. It reinvigorated my heart in a surprising way. Something about sharing a vision, really reminded me of my own desires and passions which can get lost in the day to day.

It was a nice break, but it is good to be back and sleeping in a non-bunk bed (also nice... coffee shop, I was lost without my tea).